Thursday, October 1, 2009

these days



dreamy days of dreaming, of finding and losing beauty.

There has been sadness...every day little pools of sorrow are born in my heart, everyday is trying to save a heart from drowning, a soul from breaking into shimmering bits and cosmic dust. There has been princes (taking me to the moon and back, lulling me to sleep on flower beds). If there ever was love, is breathing within me, it outshines the brightest stars, it outblooms any other force. There has been days of mindless shopping (more black shiny mascara to turn eyes into little windows of emotion, pale pink glittery lipsticks named Cinema Pearl to make lips look perfectly angelical and dreamy. red red cherry red cardigans to be sheltered from the numbing cold, perfectly watery moisturizers to quench an ever so thirsty skin). There has been a few surprises, solace in silence, new girls to cherish, the wonderful ghost of Penelope Tree, the ghost of your body yet not having you here, not feeling you terribly close like I am used to (Oh heartbreak, won't you sing me a song?). There has been too much strawberry champagne with floating maraschino cherries, too much of listening to the same old songs ("Your dreary days, your damsel days, your water days are dying"). Too many days of hope and despair, too much avoiding people's stare behind oversized dark shades, too much cookie eating, guava jam with chocolate vanilla cake. As always, too much perfume, too much time carrying the weight of things that I will never solve but that will forever haunt me.

Even though life can be too much and too sad, I still believe it's worth living, it's worth waiting, surviving, falling in love, believing, even when every thing seems perfectly impossible, even when your heart is breaking.
Love makes it all wonderful,
love awaits








a yummy breakfast I had this past weekend



Sesame toasts with goat cheese and guava jam



peach yogurt with maraschino cherries




sparkling mimosa!
(champagne and orange juice)



peach tart
(can you tell I love peach?)


1 comment:

mathyld / encore petite said...

Beautifully heartbreaking, once more ...

I think of you, often.

I have an envelope that I always feel is too empty to be sent. It's resting on my table, with your name on it. It's been seating there for weeks. Months, even.
I'll have to send it, and when I'll find nicest things, send one again :)

I miss you,
*tender hugs & autumn breeze*
x x x
___mathyld___