Thursday, December 30, 2010

♥ love ♥

One time I wrote:

“It’s love and only love. It is the way he tugs at my hips, a soft whispering voice waking me up in the middle of the night for lovemaking, it is the way I have learned to swallow him whole, the way I have always kept my feelings and fears to myself for I’ve always known he shouldn’t be burdened with such quiet desperation. He is not mine, even though he is me, he belongs to no one, he is free and weightless and I will never be able to keep him still. He’ll leave, I know he will. I am all glistening flower nectar, a fruit he bites, a pinned butterfly, a wide-eyed doll in the shape of a boy. I have no control over these feelings and emotions washing over me, I am powerless and small in his hands, a white flower carried away by the wind. This is not about me but about love, love above all things in the world”

Nothing has changed over time, my darling. I was made for love, luxurious and blushing, big brown eyes under a lush fringe of eyelashes like black widows. I am yours, a hothouse flower, lips made to welcome yours. I carry your weight, your wounds. I wear your smell, I breathe you in, I am yours for the taking, I am venim, I am love.


Elina said...

i still remember you!

<3: elina from finland with whom you wandered around louvre and paris one autumn

c* said...

oh but of course, my darling!
how have you been?
it's been so long!

do you have a blog I can follow?

we should get in touch!


Elina said...

it's been really long!
i still have the letter that you sent me and it still makes me weep every now and then! i really would like to write you a real letter someday!

i actually follow you on lj (damoiseau) but i've kept kinda silent about the whole lj because mine is just for a small audience.

i've been working on a blog in english though! i had one in finnish but it didn't feel right.

well but, i've been really well. i finally read literature in university and i couldn't be happier. now it's just a bit of a winter blues kicking in as the winter is so long in here!

we definitely should get in touch.

i adore you!